Happy Father's Day

It's Father's Day and I am with my dad. That has not happened in more years than I can remember. If anyone had seen my 'growing up' years, they would say that I got along much better with my dad than with my mom. What I know for sure is that they each taught me different things. The things I got from my dad:

1. Laughing at Yourself is Way More Fun than Defending Yourself.

I can recount so many stories about me doing or saying something stoopid and I will tell you one that my dad still uses to get a giggle out of me.

I was a sophomore in high school. I wanted to be a cheerleader more than I wanted a boyfriend. I watched cheerleaders whenever I could, I practiced cheers in the living room, I asked Ellen Keller to coach me (she lived next door and was a cheerleader). I knew that in order to have any chance of making the squad, I had to be able to do a split and get up quickly. I stretched, I worked and worked and I finally was able to get both legs straight. I was working on getting out of the split and being able to get on with the next cheer.

One day my dad and I were watching some sort of thing on TV that had a female doing a split. I don't recall what it was, all I know was that I watched and saw her go all the way down to the floor - I mean all the way down.

I got so excited and was so impressed, I jumped up and exclaimed "Daddy, her crouch hit the floor." He looked at me, with that glint in his eye and said "What?" I said "Didn't you see, she did a split and her crouch hit the floor?"

My dad's eyes were not only glinting, he could not suppress his giggle.

At that point, I heard what I said and started laughing my self. I laughed and laughed and laughed.

We said nothing else. until.....

I was practicing my splits that evening and my dad asked "Can you get your crouch to hit the floor?"

2. Slow and Steady Wins the Race

My dad worked his way up in the Telephone Company from a lineman's helper to a 2nd level manager. Pretty much, he was the only breadwinner in our family. My parents had 4 kids to raise on his salary. Given all that, he was able to retire when he turned 55 and they have not wanted for much during their 25 (and counting) years of retirement.

How'd he do it?

Slow and Steady Wins the Race, that is how.

Each raise he got, he arranged it so that only half of it got into his paycheck. The other half went directly into his retirement fund.

Out of his salary, he bought a $50 savings bond every month. I remember a picture of him on the front page of The Pioneer Magazine, holding his savings bonds fanned out like cards.

There was a very long Phone Company strike when I was in high school. My dad was management by then and worked ungodly over time. I don't know how it worked but management got paid overtime during the strike. He set up a plan where my mom got something and he got something (probably golf clubs, but I don't recall) and the rest - retirement fund.

I was able to translate the lessons about money into so many other projects that seemed impossible and taken little bits at a time, can be achieved.

3. Logic Triumphs over Emotion

I was 18 years old, working on getting my Ophthalmic Dispensing license through 'on the job training'. I was making $120 a week. I bought a brand new 1973 Capri. I had a car loan of $93.87 a month. Funny how I can remember that number.

My mom pissed me off - not an unusual occurrence for me at that time in my life. I declared "I'm moving out." I said it at the tail end of some argument I was having with my mom. I then started to make movements to do just that.

I went looking at apartments, I found a roommate, I started asking if my bed was mine and if my dresser was mine. I even bought some used furniture at a yard sale.

Come to find out, my mom went to my dad and asked him to talk to me. His job was to have me see that moving out was a bad move.

He sat me down with a pencil and paper. He asked me about my income and what my bills would be when I moved out. It was logical and emotionless. At the end of the 15 minute conversation, when I saw the bottom of each column, I said "Okay, when my car is paid off, I am outta here."

I was, with money leftover to save.

4. It's Okay to Not Poop Every Day

Not only is that okay, it is also okay and sometimes fun to admire the poop that you finally do do.

One time, my dad yelled for all of us kids to come to the bathroom. We all went and he told us to look - he was staring into the toilet bowl. I was the only one who did not run away. I looked and high-fived him. It was amazing.

5. Sometimes Apologies Are Found Between the Lines

Us kids get talking about growing up and each of us have our tales about things my dad did. Mine is "cooked carrots". They make me gag. He forced us to eat what was served for dinner. One time I started gagging and he said "You throw up and you will eat that too." I believed he would have made me do that.

Today, he says "If I had things to do over, some of them I would do differently."

I believe he would and he is sorry for those things he did.